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13-Feb-2018 14:15

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It would put them on a pedestal and make for a hugely imbalanced relationship that just isn’t sustainable.

This is not what love or an even moderately healthy relationship looks like; Whatever you’re willing to settle for is what you’re going to get.

The difficultly with compromising ourselves in order to have a ‘some crumbs relationship’ rather than ‘no crumbs at all’, is that when the inevitable happens and we end up unhappy and/or things come to an end, we wonder why we weren’t ‘enough’ and where we went ‘wrong’.

“I was willing to make ends meet with your crumbs and put them through the exaggeration oven and turn them into a loaf while making up the shortfall with my love, devotion and lack of boundaries and you don’t want me?

I’m pretty sure you’re aware of this, but just in case, here’s why: you cannot attract someone who will love you for who you are when you’re afraid to be your true self, are holding yourself to impossible standards, or are putting up with shadiness in the name of being ‘nice’ and ‘loving’.

The other thing is that people pleasing and perfectionism have already been proven to not work for you—there’s a better, easier way to live and love: becoming more of who you really are by breaking the faux rules you’ve written for your life, confronting your emotional baggage so it’s stops running you, and choosing wellbeing over pleasing.

Every once in a while, you may meet a great guy who’s all that.

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Many moons later, and here I am teaching people who are tired of emotional unavailability, toxic relationships, and feeling 'not good enough', how to reduce their emotional baggage so that they can reclaim themselves and make space for better relationships and opportunities.These days, everyone’s way too comfortable using plastic money.